The Green Room - Audition Etiquette

Reply #10 - Nov 11^th, 2009 at 10:50am

spiker Offline
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Rosie Poppins wrote on Nov 11^th, 2009 at 10:40am:

There are two, actually.

The actor was doing a monologue about bulimia for an edgy new piece to be performed on the west coast. At one point in the monologue, she literally put her fingers down her throat and vomited on the floor. �When the AD tried to stop her, the actor just continued the monologue. At the end, the actor left the room (and the mess) and the Director had the SM bring in the next actor to just do his monologue with the mess right there.
When that actor refused, the Director said that he wasn't professional at all and asked him to leave and never return.

The second story is that I know the actor who told me the story really well. He's a reasonable guy with a history of performing/directing here in UT. He sided with the Director, saying that the second actor was being 'diva-ish' and unworkable. �As he was telling me why he thought that actor was being unworkable, I sortof blacked out a little, I was so shocked that he believed in what he was telling me.

WTF?

Yeah, no. I would say no bodily fluids as part of your audition is a reasonable expectation. I probably wouldn't have refused to do my audition if I had been the 2nd actor. I probably would have said, "Do you mind if I get some paper towels from the restroom and clean this up before I audition? It's a little difficult to work around and I would hate for someone to slip and injure themselves." But I wouldn't call someone who didn't want to audition in those circumstances a diva.

"...there are more people alive now than have died in all of human history. �In other words, if everyone wanted to play Hamlet at once, they couldn't, because there aren't enough skulls!"

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Reply #11 - Nov 11^th, 2009 at 11:06am

QueenMorgaus Offline
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I'd say the second auditioner dodged a bullet. Who would want to work for a director that treats his actors so poorly as to expect them to perform in some one else's vomit?

"I don't need to compromise my principles, because they don't have the slightest bearing on what happens to me anyway." - Calvin and Hobbes

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Reply #12 - Nov 11^th, 2009 at 11:06am

The Heathenist Offline
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Mister Grinch wrote on Nov 10^th, 2009 at 11:58pm:

mr. spiker wrote on Nov 10^th, 2009 at 10:56pm:

Mister Grinch wrote on Nov 10^th, 2009 at 10:52pm:

Bring weasels, especially ones concealed in one's trousers.

Because if you have weasels in your trousers and don't offer to share ....

.... well that's just plain rude.

Honey, I'll share ALL my trouser weasels with you.

ha ha ha ha ha i don't know why, but trouser weasels is my new favorite thing ever.

I will be searching for excuses to use that term on a daily basis.

Love if you can and be loved.&&&&You see what you look for, ya know?&&&&I like smiling, smiling's my favorite!

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Reply #13 - Nov 11^th, 2009 at 11:12am

The Heathenist Offline
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it's the bitch of living.
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First of all. GROSS.

The first problem lies with the director and staff. If someone VOMITS on the floor, take an effing break from auditions and get someone to clean it up...honestly, NO ONE wants to stand in a pool of someone elses bile while singing "I'm gonna wash that man right outta my hair"...

And if the Production team is lame enough to NOT clean it up for those auditioning for them...then do what Spiker said, and ask if you can go grab some items to clean it up yourself. Hell, offer to do you monologue while cleaning it up to prove you can do two things at once.

A pox upon the person that vomited in the first place. Stupid idea. And gross. I would never cast you.

A pox upon the director and SM etc for NOT having the sense to clean up after that mess.

A pox upon the actor that wouldn't audition...things happen on stage, and you need to be prepared for whatever. And I'm SURE they wouldn't have minded if you asked for a few minutes to clean it up.

This story is gross.

I can't talk about vomit anymore...

Love if you can and be loved.&&&&You see what you look for, ya know?&&&&I like smiling, smiling's my favorite!

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Reply #14 - Nov 11^th, 2009 at 12:14pm

mr. spiker Offline
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Eagle Mountain, UT

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The whole story just reminds me that the audition is a two-way process.

As actor #2 ... the production team failed their audition, and will not get to work with me. It's simply not an organization that deserves my work.

http://www.fiftytwoplays.com

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Reply #15 - Nov 11^th, 2009 at 12:28pm

Nuff Sed Offline
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They like me, they really
like me! Wait..... Nope!
WVC, UT

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The last time I puked at an audition it wasn't voluntary..... I didn't get a call back. I did clean it up. They were very appreciative and I was embarrassed a little....LOTs.

PS: If the tummy's grumblin and fever hasn't subsided into the 2 minute warning. Let 'em know and thank them for the opportunity............... to run outside and find a trash can. Finishing the monologue with partially digested carrots clinging to your chin is not worth it. Embarrassed

Spank you very much.... � � �Nuff' Sed!

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Reply #16 - Nov 11^th, 2009 at 12:45pm

Mister Grinch Offline
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mr. spiker wrote on Nov 11^th, 2009 at 12:14pm:

The whole story just reminds me that the audition is a two-way process.

As actor #2 ... the production team failed their audition, and will not get to work with me. It's simply not an organization that deserves my work.

This.

There is one thing you never put in a trap, if you're smart - if you value your continued existence - if you have any plans about seeing tomorrow there is one thing you never EVER put in a trap.� Me.

Listen, I don't know what sort of kids you've been flying around with in outer space, but you're not telling me to shut up!

As long as I don't bleed or cry, I'll do it!

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Reply #17 - Nov 12^th, 2009 at 8:35am

gem2477 Offline
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Okay - one pet peeve I have. When someone's auditioning, I feel it is common courtesy to actually pay attention to the auditioner and not be fumbling around for papers or whispering to the other production people who are involved in the audition.

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Reply #18 - Nov 12^th, 2009 at 8:48am

kitchensinger Offline
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gem2477 wrote on Nov 12^th, 2009 at 8:35am:

Okay - one pet peeve I have. When someone's auditioning, I feel it is common courtesy to actually pay attention to the auditioner and not be fumbling around for papers or whispering to the other production people who are involved in the audition.

This happens to me every.single.time. Doesn't matter if it's a competition or audition. All auditors are the same. Name of the game, I guess.

Announcing my piece (even if none of the others who are auditioning do so) seems to help with this. It gets the attention of those behind the table and pulls them out of whatever business they're doing so that they can focus on me.

"I have noticed that nothing I never said ever did me any harm."--Calvin Coolidge&&&&"Some families go water skiing together; others go camping.....our family does THEME PARTIES." --my brother Ben

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Reply #19 - Nov 12^th, 2009 at 9:10am

Rosie Poppins Offline
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gem2477 wrote on Nov 12^th, 2009 at 8:35am:

Okay - one pet peeve I have. When someone's auditioning, I feel it is common courtesy to actually pay attention to the auditioner and not be fumbling around for papers or whispering to the other production people who are involved in the audition.

I must come to the defense of auditors here. Sometimes, full attention isn't possible. Papers seem to breed like rabbits at an audition and shuffling them can't be helped.
Also, just because the auditors eyes are not directly on you doesn't mean they are not paying attention to you. It's bad form to play directly to the auditors anyway (speaking stage here) - they need to be able to look at you and look away without you trying to hold their gaze with your own.
As a Director, I feel VERY uncomfortable when actors play directly to me (looking me in the eyes for every clue and approval) and it usually shows their lack of experience. In those cases, I purposefully shuffle papers to avoid their gaze.

With my next point, I run the risk of sounding mean - please know, I'm not trying to sound so. I don't know you, gem2477, so I don't know your abilities or skills. However, could it be that auditors are not paying attention because there are bad performance habits you need to work on?
Again - as a Director, I purposefully look away from an auditioner when they show bad habits. I don't like to watch because I want so badly for them to do well.

In other words - what are you doing as an actor to make it easy for the auditors to look at you while you audition?

Meanwhile, I think it's just good practice. You'll always, as a performer, have audience members who do not pay exact perfect attention the whole time you are performing. Audience members do not have the same distractions that auditors do, either, and I've found Auditors often pay more attention than an audience would.

It's not always rudeness that causes auditors to not be paying attention. Sometimes, it can be other things and the auditioner cannot know what those things are. Give the auditors a second thought when considering why they are not paying attention. It could be any number of things having nothing to do with you - or it could be you and there are definitely things you can do to help that.

(gem2477, you are probably an amazing performer, just wanted that said)

Let me make one thing quite clear: I never explain anything.

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